She is drop-dead gorgeous, intelligent, and totally into you. However, there's a catch: If you are like a lot of guys in the dating world, the idea of going out with a female who already has kids is intimidating, perhaps even scary. Statistics show there were nearly ten-million single moms in this country as of Consequently, the chances of you finding yourself interested in dating a mom with kids are pretty good. Dating a woman who is also a mommy may be a little different, but with a few pointers, it doesn't have to be as awkward as you might think. If you're dating a single mom, you'll have to get used to the fact that she may still have a parenting relationship with the father of the child.
For a single mother, having a few hours to spare means she found a sitter and worked hard all day preparing to make sure she has the night off. It is also unlikely that you will be able to call her on Saturday morning and get her to go out with you that evening. Be considerate of her time by making arrangements for dates in advance and doing your part to stay within her schedule.
Forget everything you know about how a date would usually go.
11 Strategies for Dating as a Single Mom
Dating a single mom is hard and could not only mean adhering to a strict schedule, it can also mean you have to be completely flexible.
Don't be surprised or offended if she has to leave a date early, cancel at the last minute, or if she has to cut you off in the middle of a romantic phone conversation.
There is no schedule for the unexpected surprises that come along with being a parent. Situations like having a suddenly sick child or receiving calls from daycare because a little one needs a change of clothes will take precedence. When you have a little one at home relying on you to do everything, alcohol is hardly a conceivable option.
She may have a glass of wine with you at dinner, but it will probably not go any further than that. She cannot take a chance on getting home inebriated and unable to care for her child or even waking up in the morning to a lingering hangover.
You may want to steer clear of any kind of talk about marriage, children or future plans too soon. However, she will likely bring up serious discussions much faster than a woman who does not have a child. A single mom doesn't have a lot of time for wasting with someone who does not have the same relationship goals as she does. Expect this topic to come up much earlier than usual.
Even if you know a fabulous restaurant an hour away or have ideas of heading a few cities over to catch a show, dating a mom will usually mean she needs to stick closer to home. Not only will a date located further away take a lot longer, she may be uncomfortable with the idea of being so far away from her children.
Before you plan an outing that involves travel, you should always clear it with her well in advance and don't take it personally if she just can't go. Moms are usually pretty apprehensive about bringing a new guy around their children before they know if said guy will stick around.
She may be fine with dating you a few times and never seeing you again, but children can form an attachment super fast. After several dates, it's okay to bring up the idea, but ultimately the decision is hers.
Let her decide when she is ready to bring you into her children's lives. Sometimes scheduling a date is easier if I can bring her.
Diana says she simply got a bad feeling when speaking to one guy over the phone. She mentioned on the call that she lives across the street from a park and suggested they meet there for a first date.
It was when he suggested that he pick her and her daughter up for a car ride to the park, that she felt major red flags. She decided to cancel the date in that moment. If your gut is telling you something is off, listen!
Dating single mom advice
Diane remembers her own mom dating when she was younger. That distinction is important because it changes the power dynamic. If you feel guilty about leaving the little ones to go out and date, take Jill's mindset: Once, when a date fell through with a late cancellation, she decided to spend the night out with some friends instead and had a blast. You've got this, mama!Should I Date a Single Mom?
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